My Heart Hurts...

I am feeling blessed today...blessed that all I have to worry about in this pregnancy is some sore feet and hands. In the moment of my pain, I feel that it can be unbearable. But then I think about Lauren. Lauren was our amazing photographer at the wedding. She did our engagement, my bridal portraits, and the wedding. I just fell in love with her. There is something about her that just makes you want to be around her. She came by in January to bring me my wedding prints and I had just found out I was pregnant...as I was telling her, she let me in on a secret as well that she was pregnant too! Just 2 weeks ahead of me.

Unlike me, she has had a hard pregnancy. Lauren went into pre-term labor at 24 weeks and her body was trying to have the baby. She was in the hospital it seemed forever and then they released her to her own bed. So half of her pregnancy was spend in bed. I read about their journey...their joy, their pain that maybe their little girl would come so early that she maybe would not make it.

Then miracles began to happen. Lauren's body began to heal and by the end of July she was off bedrest. I would read about these miracles that even the doctors couldn't explain. Lauren and her husband Matt were a rock through it all and were on their hands and knees giving all of the glory to God.

I read her blog daily to see how things were progressing....but for a few days I wasn't able to get on. The other night I opened it up to read and she had delivered at 35 weeks. Baby Life (her name is Life...how appropriate!) was finally here and weighed in at 6lbs 2oz. They seemed so relieved...but it lasted for a very short time. Apparently she became septic and her little body was shutting down. They rushed her to Children's hospital and she was put on all kind's of life support systems. Yesterday I read that she now has bleeding in the brain. They need another miracle.

Please pray for a miracle for this little baby girl. A little girl who has yet to even be held by her mommy and daddy. They pain they must be in....

As I read this I wept because THIS is unbearable pain. This is something you never expect to happen. I immediately internalize all of this and looked down at my stomach and just began to pray. I didn't know how to pray to be honest. I prayed for a miracle for this little girl...but at the same time I began thanking God for graciously giving me such a healthy pregnancy...one that Lauren would have dreamt of having. I began thinking if this were my son...what would we do? So, I couldn't sleep. I rubbed my belly all night praying for my own unborn son...that he would be healthy and that I would be able to hold him one day!

So my heart is heavy today. Heavy because for the first time ever, I can now imagine the pain this precious family must be going through. You love someone so much...someone you have never even held or touched. Amazing isn't it?

Pray for a miracle for this family!!